May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Randomize