Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
false alarm. still invincible.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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