just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
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