Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
We named our party play list daddy issues
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
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