try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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