Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
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