There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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