id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
Who did Billy Mays play for?
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
