It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
