It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
Randomize
