Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize