whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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