You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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