Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
