Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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