if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
I have peed in a lot of sinks
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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