Whod you bang
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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