I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
I need a burrito and a hug.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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