yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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