is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
