happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Randomize
