i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
