Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize