dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
Randomize
