I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Randomize
