My first STD was from a foam party
i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
