Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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