she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize