Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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