How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize