let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
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