so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
