Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
This toilet bowl is my home.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize