Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
