My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
Randomize