The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize
