you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
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