I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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