Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
