Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
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