If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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