my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
