May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
