this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
He told me they were just razor bumps!
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
