I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Randomize
