Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Randomize
