Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
