You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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