yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
