dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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