Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Someone came in the potted fern
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
